Friday, December 9, 2011

BLERG





Ok ladies I am back and I need your help!! 
I am up to 122.4! It is awful. I got all the way up to 125! I cant stand wearing clothes and I avoid going out because I am so disgusting now! If I do go out... I wear anything that makes me look skinnier than I am. My jeans miss me and it is getting cold now so i miss them too. 
I told myself once I got at least down to 120 I would come on here but I cant get there.... I have been trying for the past 3 weeks and I have only gotten as far as 122.4! I really need your help and motivation to get down to 115 or less by February.... when my hubby finally comes home!
I just got a box from him and he had bought me this gorgeous top from TopShop and he bought a size 6 (which is a US size 2) and it fits but then he also sent me 3 Vogue magazines: Spain, Russia and Paris! And I just felt like such a disappointment. he remembers me as this super fashionable skinny wife and here i am not even close.... 
So then I decided to look at old photos of me and it helped me to realize how much i need to get back to where I was. stop gorging myself with food and really focus. the one thing I cannot do is purge. My teeth lost a bunch of enamel and you can definitely tell if you look at them... its not good. I am whitening them and they are looking better. but i cannot make them worse! 
So I need to LOSE AT LEAST 7.4 POUNDS!! By february. 
My plans::
Dye my hair tomorrow! I am dying it like a chocolate brown color and am super excited! It will be like giving me a fresh start.
I work today from 12-6 So I cannot eat during that time. 
I gave up coffee like almost 2 weeks ago now. I am drinking tea instead... I don't really know if it is better... but it doesn't give me bad coffee breath or anything.


NEW RULES: I will add a rule on top of this every week until I get to my goal.
No eating after 8pm and before 8am.
Must exercise the amount of calories I eat or more.
Must go to the gym at least 3 times a week.
Must read vogue everyday or some fashion magazine (online or off line)
Read at least 5 blogs everyday :-) I will probs read more to keep busy and distracted.


I love you all!!!! Please comment and put your blog thing so I can follow if I don't already! I need you all to help me keep busy!!!! 
muah! <3

7 comments:

  1. I know how you feel,I do that also,always distract myself from food. xD
    I'm currently fasting,so I need help to. If you want you can e-mail me,we can keep each other on track :D - goxyswety@hotmail.com

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  2. Welcome back! :D The plan sounds good, just stick to it and you'll do fine! :) xx

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  3. I'm studying to be a dental assistant. Make sure you consistently use pronamel or sensodyne. Enamel does not grow back, its like gum tissue when its gone its gone. The yello color is the next layer under your teeth called dentin. You can't whiten that part in fact when you whiten your teeth you leave them sensitive to stain for the first 48 hours.

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  4. I know what you mean. But I do think it is a cycle of all this shit that you're skinny, you eat yourself fat again, get a shock, get skinny and start all over. :( I'm in a cycle right now. OO BLOG IDEA! Thinking thin! Xo

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  5. Long time no write I was starting to worry about you nice to see you back

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  6. Hey doll face. I can imagine the pressure you are feeling!! You can do this. You are so strong! You have always inspired me with your strength and determination. You can get there!!! I'm here for you!

    Love

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  7. Welcome back i missed your blog,i know what you mean i gain alot of weight and i seemed to have plateaued, i know you will lose the weight and look beautiful when your hubby comes back <3

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