Friday, August 10, 2012

they just keep coming



i apologize in advance for the scatter brained post.
the weigh in: 111 :-) another goal!! 
today i am going shopping!! none of my clothes fit right anymore... my jeans are too loose, my skirts fall off, and my shirts are sooo baggy. i will update my measurements here in a minute. 
the guy i almost fooled around with the other day... he asked me what size i was when he noticed how baggy my clothes were and i honestly had no idea! 
i got asked out three times yesterday! by three different guys! i guess my hard work is paying off for something... 
the hubby and i decided to have an open relationship a couple days ago. we are already in a sort of threesome but now anyone is up for grabs. now i dont have to feel bad about fooling around with that guy i talked about before.
we know we are each others number one but we got married at 19 and we just dont want to have any regrets... we are 3 and a half years married :-)

yesterday the only thing i ate was a toaster struedel!! still haven't eaten either... i guess im fasting but i didnt even plan on it... 

studying for the lsat is going well except the strengthen/weaken questions.... those are hard.

my best friend is arriving today for the weekend! i cant wait! i will have to be careful and save my calories for some drinks!! doesn't take much these days :-) i was drunk off like one beer the other day haha i dont mind though :-) less calories!! 

love you all!!!
<3 b="b">

Sunday, August 5, 2012

hunger is confusing

hey girlies!
the weigh-in... 111.6 :-)

so i went out with the guy from two posts ago... nothing happened just hung out. 
not sure about if ill do that again... at least just the two of us. 
might go to the beach tomorrow with ppl from work tomorrow but i dunno... it depends on when.
my sisters are coming in from out of town! it will be a fun girls time! they will get here in the mid afternoon so i dunno about the beach...
im actually kind of worried about going to the beach... the whole swimsuit issue. my ribs totally stick out like its cool and even the ribs in my back... i dont really want any "youre too skinny your bones are sticking out" comments you know? with clothes on it looks fine but without... i just dont know what other people would say or think. 


ok but enough of that... the title of my post! yesterday i had like half of breakfast and then didnt eat again until like 2 in the morning... i had some noodles. i just wasn't really hungry. like my stomach was making noises and all but my head just wasn't hungry. does that ever happen to you? then today... it is 1:30 in the afternoon and i have had like a handful of sweet potato fries and i pretty much had to force myself to do that. eating is making me feel nausous... and i didnt even drink last night! 
love you girls!!
<3 b="b">







Saturday, August 4, 2012

twig







i got called a  twig today! felt kinda good suppose. but i still feel pretty gargantuan. the weigh-in brought me down to 112.8 only like a pound and a half until i reach that "underweight" bench mark. 
what people said about me at work today... (im a waitress)
5 yr kid: excuse me, excuse me... you are beautiful! 
random guy going to his table: sorry for staring, but i just think you are a beautiful woman
cook number 1: you are "fiiine" for a white girl 
cook number 2 (who i think is pretty damn hot (also covered in tattoos! yumm!!)): yeah you are fine for a white girl!
cook number 1 to cook number 3(the newbie) : don't you think she is fine?
cook number 3: you are beautiful
cook 2: but beautiful is different than fine
cook 3: no its not...
cook 1: yeah it is.


anyways... that was my day at work. the tips sucked but the compliments were nice. even if they were a little creepy from the random guy... guys with tattoos are just so smokin hot! 
oh cook number 2 has also told me many times that he is waiting for me (he is pretty sure my marriage wont last... which is pretty common around this military town) 
today he says he loves me. 
this guy is different from the one i was contemplating about yesterday... that one also has some sweet tattoos but he is not as smokin. 


todays food: some yogurt and cereal: 200
thats it... i went to work at 2:30 and got home at 10:00ish  
im about to down a huge glass of water, shower and watch some tv


love you alllll!!!!!
<3 b="b">

Friday, August 3, 2012

where does the time go sometimes?

hope you girls are all doing well!!!!!!!! i have missed you!! welcome back ascendancy!!! this post is going to be all over the place and random... please bear with me. my life is a little bit of a mess right now. well my brain is anyways




well i am still fluctuating around 113 (give or take half a pound each day...)
i am now studying to take the lsat in october! some formal logic for you gals:
if i eat i will get fat. if i am fat i will be unhappy. if i am happy then i am skinny. if i am skinny then i can wear those jeans that dont fit yet. if i can wear those jeans then i will be super hot. if i am super hot then all guys will want to be with me. so if i did not eat then all guys will want to be with me. 
i have started taking an lsat course so i can get a super awesome score and be a kickass lawyer. formal logic is the beginning of the course. and this is what i was thinking when doing my homework haha.


today i have eaten: 1/2 of a greek yogurt, some granola, a handful of chips, and a fiber one bar.
calories: 450
not so sure about my exercise... i might eat dinner later.... but for now i am sipping on a zero calorie monster... 


so i know you girls listen (and hopefully don't judge).... for the past couple weeks i have been coming so close to cheating on my hubby. i repeat... close. i have not done anything yet. 
sometimes i think i am like a sex addict or something. our schedules have been so opposite lately and i have been so horny. so i have almost been cheating on my hubby with this guy at work. 
i have cheated on him twice since we have been together sort of. first time with a drug dealer and second time with my best friend (yeah.. a girl). the second time i don't like to count since we have a threesome together and then he said it was ok to fool around with her while he was on deployment... weird understanding i know. he knows about all of it and our relationship is so strong!
now we have decided maybe we want to be swingers. we married young (three years and 3 months!) and want to have fun but still want to be with each other forever. (both of our ideas... he has never cheated). 
anyways.. i just wanted to get that off my chest and write it out so i can think about it more clearly. 
love you all!! 


<3 b="b">