A Monday of Mondays

First things first. so i watched this show the other day i think it was on E! with my other half. it was about this anorexic girl who got down to 54 pounds! and she was 5 feet 5! they showed pictures and she was just bones and skin. she talked about what she ate and what she thought about and the rules she made for herself. the weirdest thing that i had never imagined before that she did was trick her body into sugar. she would eat about 200 packets of sweetener a day! she put it in everything. in mac and cheese, ramen noodles, salad.... whatever. she drank only every 4 hours and ate i think 2 times a day. at 10 in the morning and then at midnight. she was back to 107 in the show. it was a crazy show but somehow i felt like i connected to her and it didn't turn me off or anything. i will still lose weight. sometimes i wonder if they make these shows to scare us... does it ever scare any of us? I will make anew poll i think about it.


So I am picking up my wedding dress finally today. I was supposed to have it in April but so many things went wrong that I am only getting it now... my wedding is in less than a month! it is just the perfect dress! I absolutely love it so the wait was worth it :-)


So this will be an odd thing to write after that but I had been so constipated for the last 5 days i finally broke down and took a laxative yesterday. i hadnt taken one in so long that i forgot how bad they can be. but the good news is i am not constipated anymore. i feel so much better! i think it is one of the most uncomfortable feelings.... so now i can get back on schedule and lose lose lose. btw i used the laxative tea and it worked really well.


my weigh in this morning was 117. I know it is probably because of the laxative so i won't change my stats but i am glad it was not some huge number. thinking about it though, i really didnt eat a whole lot. i just felt like i did because nothing was coming out. i'm sure i will have a good number on the scale tomorrow. i really want to have my own scale... i wonder how hard it would be to hide one. hmmm...


so i absolutely love my frye boots :-) they are the best boots ever! 


i am about to eat breakfast and then off to get the dress:


intake: 
oatmeal, low sugar : 120


I hope you are all doing well! I will go comment on your posts now and catch up on all the ones i missed this weekend.


<3